Archive: March 2004

Pain in the behind is still there. Other than that, the physical side is OK.

If you haven't seen it yet, the Patient Symptom Record shows the side effects chemo is having on me.

While I'm not looking forward to increased severity of side effects, I AM looking forward to the end of treatments by the end of next week.

Got a small fluorescent light so I can sort my lily seeds. Don't want to plant duds now, do we? Last fall I did not have a chance to sort them, so everything went into the freezer. That's a job for this coming week.

Received an email from Phil which I did not read until today, with some very good insights about our culture.

Planted what I think are viable lily seeds. Now we'll have to wait and see. They're mostly Asiatics, and also a yellow tiger, and what might be an LA hybrid.

Saw Dr. Pedersen after RT, and he suggested not using soap on the sunburn area. Well, let's try that...

Nice lunch with Tim today. Not the toolman, but... ;-) Tim figured I looked 10 years younger than six weeks ago, and who am I to argue!?

Blood count still holding good.

The nurse, Brenda, followed up on the doctor's recommendations and said not even to use toilet paper, but just a bottle of water. Paul suggested I should get a bidet. I'll see how the bottle works first.The nurse also pointed out that even though next week is my last week of radiation, the effects won't be gone for two or three more weeks. So putting on a brave face and saying, "I can handle another week," is foolish... OK, I'll keep that in mind.

Symptoms are very painful BMs and slight rectal bleeding. Hemorrhoids are developing also...

I was kind of glad the RT computer had problems today. Gave me a chance to talk to one of the nurses about the treatment. The Clinac 21EX machine is used to deliver electron beams for skin and near skin radiation, while it uses photons for organ radiation as in my case. The reason for my sunburn or diaper rash, is the radiation from the front. It is set to have maximum power at the growth position and since it is near the back of my body, there is still a lot of energy that hits the skin on the way out. Very interesting.

And by the way, they use green lasers to line me up with the RT equipment. I've only seen red and white before...

I'm thinking that had I known what I wanted to do after high school, I might have been in the medical field (or a gardener)...

Just found out that Darlene's uncle passed away, so Pat will be driving tomorrow instead. My condolences to Darlene and her family.

Final chemo change! Just like two weeks ago, there was no blood return when they flushed the PICC line. So we did the x-rays and PTA routine and then there was a proper blood return.

I feel like celebrating. One more week of treatment. It seems like such a long time ago since I started on January 30th.

One observation that's rather subtle. On the PSR they only ask about fatigue but not about energy. Even though I don't feel tired, I have very little energy to do something. Wazzup???

Granddaughter Alicia is with us for a sleep-over, so we went to the mall this evening to have some A&W burgers, did a bit of shopping and then spent some time in the pet store.

All the prescribed ointments for the "sunburn" seem to be just stopgap measures. They work as long as I don't have to go bathroom... I'm relying on codeine and Tylenol to get me through these next few weeks.

Alicia came with us to the Apon open house for Alida's baby. Very nice visit with good friends.

After that, she and Cecile made me a very good tasting pizza: mushroom, ham and pineapple.

Bathroom time used to be for playing Solitaire, now it's hell. Can't even get a decent game in these days... Perhaps I'll just stop eating the next couple of weeks.

Spent the day sitting around the house like a trucker...

Uneventful RT.

Last week of treatment! 

Gave Dennis some lily seeds, a NALS QB, and a lily catalog. Good luck, Dennis, and when they bloom, bring some down to RT6!

RT was early again. Done at 2:15, originally the start time of my RT session.

Had a visit from Walt and Rob. Rob has some form of Hepatitis C and needs to inject himself with chemo once a week. Then he is sick for 2 or 3 days. Yikes. Makes my treatment seem like a pleasure trip...

RT early again. Are they trying to make my last few days happy days?

Saw Dr. Pedersen for the last time. I guess I will see him again in 2.5 months or so for after-surgery chemo.

Had not counted on the chemo treatments after the surgery, but I guess it will be part of the program... That chemo will happen at the CCI, and not via a PICC line. I imagine that depending on the duration of that treatment, I may show more side effects than I have to date.

At least, after Friday, I will not have to visit the CCI for a while. I've asked the RT technicians if Cecile could check out the treatment room on Friday and they said that was OK.

No blood work and no nurse's visit today. Probably because I'm not getting more chemo tomorrow. Works for me.

Angela drove me today, and she had a peek at the treatment room. "Such a big room, and such a big machine," was her reaction. I guess it's a bit overwhelming seeing it for the first time.

Had a good conversation with Caitlin from Manulife, my STD insurance company. Not having been on Short Term Disability before, I am in a bit of unfamiliar territory, and we spoke quite a long time about treatment plans and what a typical day looked like for me. Interesting that with all the forms doctors fill in, they don't give as much information as the insurance companies would like. The doctors just answer the questions, but the insurance company does not necessarily know what questions to ask in an individual case.

Last RT session and removal of PICC line, chemo pump and chemo bag. They would not let me take the PICC line home, so we'll see if Cecile's pictures works out.
BMs are still very painful, and so is sitting. Falling asleep after a night time BM can take 30 minutes to an hour. Codeine to the rescue...

Here are some photos of the last treatments.

Lost my buddy "Alfred" today, but I'm sure he will make new friends soon enough. Alfred replaced Betsy on February 14th with much better results.
Removing the PICC line did not take long and was not painful, although I could feel something being pulled out. The nurse applying pressure on the exit hole was the most painful.
That first shower in a month felt so good, hard to describe...
Thank you, Pat, for an appropriate reflection message today.

So what's ahead now? First, I need to make an appointment with Dr. Stewart for the week of April 19th. He will then schedule the surgery, likely in the first half of May. About 10 days in the hospital to recover. Then another round of chemo to bring us somewhere into June and possibly back to work in July, but more likely August.

First full day of freedom from the PICC line and chemo pump.
Went to Lee Valley this afternoon, just to browse. Then on my way to CompuSmart, I noticed Nature's Everblooming Garden Centre. I had seen it before, but never made the time to stop in. This time, I'm glad I did. Nice to just browse around. Really enjoyed the afternoon just driving around in the sunshine.

The hole where the PICC line was removed on Friday, is healing very nicely. I wish I could say the same about the burn area...

I think I see a lily seedling popping up in my tray.

Managed almost six hours of sleep last night, without having to run to the bathroom. I can use more of those nights...

Well, I spoke too soon. Last night I was awake more than asleep. Ouch...

Seedlings are getting bigger... :)

You may have noticed that I am still updating my patient symptom record. I hope that soon the number under pain will start to drop...

Went and drooled over Vincent's new G5 dual CPU Apple computer. Nice engineering job. First time I walked over since before treatments started. I was rather pooped, but proud it took only 17 minutes. My last record was 20 minutes...
Surprise when I picked up the van from the dealer (oil change, etc.) this afternoon. They could not find the keys. Turns out somebody was washing it and vacuuming also. They can do that every time. :)

Although BMs are still painful, at least wiping is getting better. Must be that the burnt skin is healing.

Not much to do today, so I got a haircut. Two people told me in the last few weeks that with my weight loss, I look like a "chick magnet." What do they mean by that? ;-)
I find it very meaningful, that my support family (that includes family, friends, co-workers, and sometimes total strangers) continues to be so active. I don't think there has been a day that I have not received a note of encouragement, a visit, a phone call, or a humorous or inspirational message. I may have said it before, but if I haven't, my experience has been different in the past where my family members were asked how I was doing, but no direct contact would be made. The last three months I have seen the better side of people. I do believe that God works in many hearts, and it stirs mine.
If you ever get to watch CNBC's Cover to Cover, there is an episode that is repeating yet worth watching. It deals with Lance Williams' bout with leukemia.

Except for the hemorrhoids, life seems to be getting better. Mind you, I'm still getting chemo out of my system. I'm tempted to turn off the light to see if it glows in the dark... ;-)

Went to the 2004 Home and Garden show at Northlands, and afterward visited with my staff and other friends at work. Not enough time to visit more...
Cliff suggested I write a book about my experiences and call it "Pain In The Ass." Not sure about that title, though...

Getting some good info from a friend about treating hemorrhoids. Will definitely have to look into some of these options.

Time to start hacking away at some ice in the backyard. If I do a little every day, I hope that in two or three weeks I will be able to bring my waterlilies outside.
Good piece of reflection from Phil. Sorry I did not get to it sooner, Phil!

Is it SPRING yet? Still getting snow this morning...

Appointment with Dr. Stewart, my surgeon, is on April 26, 3:45PM.

Lovely day today to be outside. Shovelled some snow, although I feel pooped in very short time, at least I'm getting some exercise. With my birdfeeders, there's a bunch of songbirds with a red chest and a red hat, a bit smaller than a sparrow.

Some people wonder why the doctors had not prescribed anything for the hemorrhoids. They had, but I guess the first priority was to reduce the impact from burns from the radiation treatment. That is starting to show its effectiveness now. I am two days without codeine (maybe that's why I hardly slept last night). But my skin itches, and when I rub certain places, skin comes off like from a sunburn.

Been watching the "CANADA - A People's History" documentary series over the last few days. Very, very insightful. I never knew that the US had tried to invade Canada on several occasions, but never succeeded. I am also more sympathetic to the original French settlers. They at least sought the Indians out as partners in trade. All the English wanted was to eradicate them because they stood in the way. I'll be looking for episode 6 onward now, because all I got was episode 1 through 5.

Today was a lovely spring day, 14? Celsius in my backyard. Cleaned out a lot of ice and snow, and even started on removing some straw and leaves. The beginning of next week is supposed to be even warmer... I like!
Planted a lily bulb (two, actually, but I think only one will make it) from Kathleen Mingl (Chianti X Ventoux) in a 4" pot. These bulbs arrived after the ground had already frozen, so they spent the winter in the fridge in a tupperware container. One bulb felt a bit mushy and was brown, but the smaller one seems to have survived. So we'll see soon enough.
Went to Hole's to get out of the house on such a fine day, and to see what they had already brought in for spring planting.

Pain is more bearable today, and I slept a four hour stretch last night, something that does not happen often.

So much for spring. Woke up to -14? Celsius with wind chills to -30... Thanks for sending your arctic high, Darm! ;-)
Spent the afternoon at Northlands. Staff are getting pumped about hosting the Juno Awards next week.
Finally got my Critical Illness insurance cheque today. Took two months to get it. What if a person has only that long to live?
Cecile and I went out for a very nice dinner at La Boheme. The bison steak was excellent!

Sleep was again a problem... Wide awake at 2AM and just dozed here and there a bit, but really did not get any sleep to speak off. I figure a total of about 3 hours...

Got a 3-tier "flora-light" system at Lee-Valley today. Now I can start planting stuff for spring!

Had a really good night. Went to bed at 10:30 and woke up only once before 6:30AM.
The pain in the backside is getting better, but the mucous discharge is not, so I need to stay close to bathrooms...

Had a good dump of snow last night (2-3 inches), but most of it disappeared during the day.
Planted some seeds and bulbs today, ready for spring!
New toy to play with too... Here's a sample shot.

I have discontinued updating the patient symptom record as of today. Not much to report anymore, until the next round of chemo.

A wonderful friend and neighbour returned from a few months in Mexico a few days ago and stopped in this evening to visit. Welcome home, Gabriella!

Did some ice removal from the pond today. Before and after shots don't show much progress, but I sure worked up a sweat...

This week I hope to place an order for a laptop so I can work in the living room and don't have to go into the basement where there is no daylight. Daylight and sunshine have become very important mood lifters the past few months.
Beautiful day today, 18?C and warmer tomorrow! :)

Thanks Darlene, for this joke. Perhaps I should try it...

The owner of a drug store walks in to find a guy leaning heavily against the wall. The owner asks the clerk, "What's with that guy over there by the wall?"
The clerk says, "Well, he came in here this morning to get something for his cough. I couldn't find the cough syrup, so I gave him an entire bottle of laxative."
The owner says, "You idiot! You can't treat a cough with a bottle of laxative!"
The clerk answers, "Of course you can! Look at him. He's afraid to cough!"

Placed my order for a laptop today. ETA is April 15th...
Time for some more ice removal...24?C! Made quite a bit of progress, but too pooped to continue.
I think mice are eating my bulbs, the buggers...
Well, time to watch Dutch soccer, Ajax is playing Alkmaar. Saw Chelsea make a very nice win this week too. Paul should be pleased. :)

Well, I'll be... Snow this morning! Glad it was all gone by noon.
My largest koi died today. Was just floating on his side. This guy started out as a red and white fish, but turned almost completely white last summer in the pond. He measured 18 inches long (46cm).
Received a get-well card and some lily seeds from Libby today: L. Canadense rubrum. Thanks much! Do I plant them now, or wait?